Cooking With Chef Sekh
by SilverDragoness
Summary: ::snickers:: A hungry Sekhmet+an evil mircowave= Laughs ::grins::


Disclaimers: Don't own 'em, so Don't sue. I am making ZERO profit off this...well maybe just alittle, just kidding, don't sue, cause you won't get NOTHING! Well....maybe some lint but that's it.  
  
Author's Note: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm an evil one I tell ya. ::snickers:: I had fun writing this, and it only took about 45 minutes to type. I hope ya have fun reading it :-) If you wanna a follow up story, with the Ronins, let me know and I'll see what my crazy muses come up with.  
  
Sekh had just woken up and the other three warlords, Callisto and Kayura were  
gone. Sekh ran a hand through his untamed green hair and his stomach grumbled. "Oh  
great..." Sekh said to himself, he was all alone and hungry. "Perfect, just perfect." He  
groaned as his stomach growled in requirement of eats. (AN: It is a word, I looked it up  
:-D ) Sekh sighed as he walked to the kitchen, still in his baby blue pajamas.  
  
He looked at the clock and seen that it read 4:00 PM. He glared at the stove, they  
have had numerous run-ins with each other, usually the stove won. He ignored the stove  
which seemingly began taunting him and searched through the cupboards. He found a  
pack of rice. "Shouldn't be too hard." He said "Yeah right, your just Chef Sekhmet, aren't  
you?" The stove replied...at least Sekh thought so. Sekh sighed for what seemed the 500th  
time that day. Poopsie his pet snake slithered into the room and looked curiously at Sekh.  
  
"Good thing your here, Poopsie, tell me what this says." Sekh shoved the packet  
of rice in the poor snake's face. The snake looked like it rolled it's eyes and slithered  
away. "Great Poopsie, leave me then." He said sticking his tongue out at the retreating  
snake. He glanced at the instructions and said "I don't need any instructions" before  
throwing them away and deciding to cook it in the microwave. Sekh glanced up at the  
mircrowave and could have sworn on a stack of Bibles that it began laughing at him...  
  
"That thing can't be as evil as the stove can it?" Sekh said to himself again (AN:  
Yes Sekh has a slight habit of talking to himself. ::grins evilly::) He then began to pretend  
he was a chef on TV...(AN: ::laughs::)  
  
Sekh ties an apron around his pajama clad self and talks to the wall as if it's a TV.  
"Welcome back to Cooking With Chef Sekhmet, today I'm cooking rice, this shouldn't be  
too hard, for all you folks at home." Sekh puts the rice in a big, huge bowl and adds 10  
cups of water. "Now after you've added the water you add some vegetables." Sekh finds  
some carrots in the refrigerator.  
  
"Now you just cut the carrots up like this.." Sekh begins cutting, and cutting, and  
cutting, and cutting, then...... "OUCH!" Sekh exclaimed grabbing his finger hand looking  
at it with tears in his eyes. The knife Sekh used, fell off the counter and landed on Sekh's  
foot...pointy end first... causing Sekh to grab his foot and jump up and down on the other.  
(Sekh: What did I ever do to you? SD: ::smirks:: Nothing, Sekh, you're just more fun to  
pick on) Sekh hopped over to the sink, which happened to be on the other side of the  
kitchen, and washed his finger off, then put his foot up to the sink and slid on some water  
that just 'happened' to be on the ground. After Sekh was done he carefully walked back to  
the other counter. He put what was cut in the bowl and put it in the microwave for 30  
minutes. So Sekh went to watch TV while it cooked.  
  
Sekh had fallen asleep while watching TV and woke up to the smell of something  
burning... (AN: Gee I wonder what happened?) Sekh ran in the kitchen to see the  
microwave in flames "Good gravy, where's Torrent when you need him?" He yelled.  
Poopsie gave him an accusing look and Sekh turned his attention to the snake. "THIS IS  
YOUR FAULT, POOPSIE!" Then he realized that well, the wall was now on fire, and  
spreading. So Sekh turned the sink on and tired putting out the flames but alas, it didn't  
work. So Sekh finally wised up and got the fire extingustor after 5 minutes. After the evil  
microwave was calmed he tiredly walked back to the living room, to wait his fate once the  
others; specifically the girls got there. "I'm so dead." he said looking at the burnt interior  
of the kitchen.  
  
2 hours later the guys came back from their jobs and the girls came back from  
shopping, and just happened to walk in at the exact same time. Callisto was the first to  
speak, "Something is burnt." She said matter-of-factly. Kayura sniffed the air "You are  
right... smells like...burnt rice." The three guys knew exactly what Sekh had done. "Wait  
until the Ronins hear this, especially Torrent, they are going to die." Kale said in between  
laughter. Anubis was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes, while Kale was holding his  
sides laughing, and Dais wore a cocky grin. "Sekhmet..." Kayura and Callisto said at the  
exact same time, while glaring at Sekh. Callisto glanced at the kitchen. "Oh, in the name of  
Aelia what possessed you to even TRY and cook?" She said glaring a hole through Sekh.  
"I was hungry?" He said in a childish voice knowing the girls would more than likely give  
him a severe beating. Callisto sighed, "Kayura you, deal with him, I'm too tired. Dais, call  
a pizza place...." She grinned "And make sure to call over to Mia's and invite the Ronins." The guys laughed and Kayura grinned as Dais ordered a pizza then called the Ronins, who agreed to come over. 


End file.
